"I CAN'T FORCE YOU TO LOVE ME"

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Whilst some Cursillistas were able to attend the National Ultreya at Southwark Cathedral last September, those of us who were unable to attend had the opportunity to see Adrian Plass at the Wilmslow Leisure Centre.

Billed as "An Unpredictable Evening with Adrian Plass," the event was being staged by the Bible Society. It certainly lived up to it's 'Unpredictable' title: a mixture of both humorous and more serious issues proved a most entertaining evening.

Adrians monologues and dialogues always have an underlying lesson whether they are serious or humorous; and Adrians delivery allows the lesson to slip in without noticing.

His presentation, on this occasion, included a number of sketches with which I was already familiar, but most of the material was new to me. He provoked emotions ranging from the verge of tears to almost uncontrollable laughter.

Just as in his books, he manages to produce caricatures of aspects of church life which exaggerate (to a greater or lesser extent) to a point where you easily identify with a situation: but at the same time are relieved that it's not as bad as the example!

Take, for example, Adrians church notices: he managed to pull out the very essence of the typical church notice with an announcement concerning the location of the key for the side chapel. (I cannot remember the exact wording, but it was something like the following.)

"The key for the side chapel is kept in the junction box by the vestry door, the key for the junction box is kept in the tall cabinet under the tower. The key for the tall cabinet under the tower is kept in the chest in the vestry and the key for the chest in the vestry is kept by Mr Such-and-such. Mr Such-and-such makes the key available on the first and third Wednesdays and the second and fourth Thursdays, except for when the first of the month is on a Friday when the key is available on the second and third Tuesday and the first and last Friday. We are a little concerned that this facility is underused."

Another 'tradition' at the sharp end of Adrians wit was the reading of the lesson. He conjured a picture of a man approaching the lectern to read the Old Testament lesson, not having previously read it through, to discover that it involves many long Jewish names. Nick Page played the part of the reader---faltering his way through a particularly tortuous few verses.

In a different vein, Adrian enacted a possible dialogue between God and Gideon. Gideon, being a nervously hesitant character, is 'guided' into cutting down his army from thirty-two thousand to three hundred by a variety of means. The climax of the conversation is reached when Gideon reports back to God, who enquires "How's it going?" Gideons response is "Three hundred left. Tents and provisions for thirty-two thousand being shared by three hundred dentally handy-lapped men. God?" "Yes?" God enquires. "I'm frightened." The full story is (as I'm sure you all know, but I'll remind you just in case) in Judges 7:1-8.

Musical accompaniment was beautifully provided throughout the evening by Simeon on flute, panpipes, overtone whistle and by John on various guitars.

For me, the most moving part of the whole evening was a piece right at the end of the evening, which illustrated how God regards us. The theme throughout was "I can't force you to love me."

Geoff Riley

Copyright © 1997 Chester Anglican Cursillo
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